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Family fighting my relationship!!

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Family fighting my relationship!!

Postby buhleNazo » Mon Sep 26, 2016 2:57 pm

Good day, im a 21 year old lady I need an advise regarding the feud going on between me and my family. I'm a varsity student this year I took a gap because I found out my uncle used up all the money that was left by my father for me to study so my family decided to be secretive about this issue until now, I only found out about this earlier this year my parents passed away by the way, I used to live with my grandmother. Now the issue is I met this guy last year, his doing his last year at varsity. We dated for about a year now, the thing with my family fighting my relationship with him started when the relationship was still new they would literally call him so many years and apparently there's a history between my family with my bf's family nonetheless his family at first didn't like me but they ended up accepting me as their sons girlfriend. My family went to an extent of taking me away from him, they decided that I should live with my aunt far from him. At first they said to me since I'm going through a gap year i should change the environment of which I did not understand I enjoyed staying with my grandmother most importantly she's sick so I wanted to be there for her as she is now living with my younger cousins they are 12 years old so she has no one who atleast will do the house chores and everything. My family decides to take me away from my boyfriend because of some issues they have with his family whenever they bring up his name they include his family, my uncle went to an extent of confronting him but my bf didn't want to worry me he said he didn't say much, now the worst part is that I'm pregnant. And I've told them, I now live with my two aunts very far away from home.I apologized for falling pregnant and am guess what none of them decided to hear me out each and every day I'm insulted and what angers me more they include my deceased mother too they talk bad about her and I feel like they are unappreciating the fact that my own mother had to go work at an early age for her siblings since she was the first born, as little as she earned she ensured her siblings are well taken of,and went to school but now I have no parents im mistreated my whole life I've never done anything that would disrespect my family. I did a terrible mistake by falling pregnant but they never want to hear me out and they saying I will suffer with the baby and I'm not gonna go back to school next year. I need serious help I've reached out to other family members and there is one of my extended family member who's willing to help me she insists that I leave them and go stay with her. Meaning I will have to write a note and leave. I'm scared they will say the obvious that I left because im after my boyfriend if only they knew that my relationship is going through a rough patch in no time we might break up their goal of drafting us apart is finally becoming a reality.

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Theotherguy (Mon Nov 28, 2016 2:50 pm)
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Re: Family fighting my relationship!!

Postby Magnetic » Wed Nov 09, 2016 5:00 am

My sister your story touched me i know u rili nid a solution but i would advise you to pray seek God alot i sense that your family would do anything to take everything good from you,i feel like your boyfriend should also man up n support you n the baby regardless of your situation but even if you guyz break up u will be fine ,,,,you n your bf should also figure out 2geda how ul raise your baby financially,emotionally,emotionally n psychologically even if ya'll seperate or not
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Re: Family fighting

Postby Sholen » Wed Nov 09, 2016 10:03 pm

hy
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Re: Family fighting my relationship!!

Postby Eduardo » Thu Nov 10, 2016 2:26 pm

hey
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Re: Family fighting my relationship!!

Postby MELLOWYELLOW » Wed Jan 04, 2017 11:08 am

Look forward to ur perfection view dear.Even it may seem difficult invite good in ur ways am still young BT I knw DE pain of wat UA gng thru...it really hurts "for a family to choose for u hu u s
hld date an not...(my situation)"
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Re: Family fighting my relationship!!

Postby Souljah » Sat Jun 03, 2017 5:02 pm

buhleNazo wrote:Good day, im a 21 year old lady I need an advise regarding the feud going on between me and my family. I'm a varsity student this year I took a gap because I found out my uncle used up all the money that was left by my father for me to study so my family decided to be secretive about this issue until now, I only found out about this earlier this year my parents passed away by the way, I used to live with my grandmother. Now the issue is I met this guy last year, his doing his last year at varsity. We dated for about a year now, the thing with my family fighting my relationship with him started when the relationship was still new they would literally call him so many years and apparently there's a history between my family with my bf's family nonetheless his family at first didn't like me but they ended up accepting me as their sons girlfriend. My family went to an extent of taking me away from him, they decided that I should live with my aunt far from him. At first they said to me since I'm going through a gap year i should change the environment of which I did not understand I enjoyed staying with my grandmother most importantly she's sick so I wanted to be there for her as she is now living with my younger cousins they are 12 years old so she has no one who atleast will do the house chores and everything. My family decides to take me away from my boyfriend because of some issues they have with his family whenever they bring up his name they include his family, my uncle went to an extent of confronting him but my bf didn't want to worry me he said he didn't say much, now the worst part is that I'm pregnant. And I've told them, I now live with my two aunts very far away from home.I apologized for falling pregnant and am guess what none of them decided to hear me out each and every day I'm insulted and what angers me more they include my deceased mother too they talk bad about her and I feel like they are unappreciating the fact that my own mother had to go work at an early age for her siblings since she was the first born, as little as she earned she ensured her siblings are well taken of,and went to school but now I have no parents im mistreated my whole life I've never done anything that would disrespect my family. I did a terrible mistake by falling pregnant but they never want to hear me out and they saying I will suffer with the baby and I'm not gonna go back to school next year. I need serious help I've reached out to other family members and there is one of my extended family member who's willing to help me she insists that I leave them and go stay with her. Meaning I will have to write a note and leave. I'm scared they will say the obvious that I left because im after my boyfriend if only they knew that my relationship is going through a rough patch in no time we might break up their goal of drafting us apart is finally becoming a reality.


All families hve situations like this because dats wot makes dem family. Even though we dnt c der intentions cos its misinterpreted n therefor dnt c dat their effort spent in being in ur life judging u n being harsh on u is nt cos u a burden o a regret they hve of u. Its their way of saying they care 4 ur well being n care for u mre den u realise til u older n learn tinkn using reason and nt thro emotion.
Eva heard da saying " u hve 2 b cruel 2 b kind"?
Dats wot they doing because their main concern is that they want to ensure that u focussed on studies as a lot of money was spent and nw dey afraid dat u goin to neglect priorities by blindsided infatuation. Love makes u irrational n we end up mkn idiot of ourselves to points we wud even wage war on flesh n blood jus 4 da sake of ur bf honour. Guess wot tho. Its only family that will always be der any time any day everytime u need. I've had endless quarrels wit my family over love n moved of in anger many times and i treated them in ways I'd later learned to regret because wen relationships ended my family took me back without hesitation. I cud Neva c or understand der motives 4 nt likin my gfs, but dey being da elder an wise shud of been trusted without rebellion cos dey c things we end up being heartbroken ova.
Der concern is ur education whic shud b ur focus. ( already u failed them n ur parents da moment u decided quitting schl.)
Their anger to u is da love u shud accept so already by being in varsity means u hve mre intelligence to tink n act rational. U young and nw u let urself be selfish n cruel to bringl a life before u even made a life.
Pregnancy is wonderful n great n no reason studyn shud become an option. Ur family is der n will help u, but nw u need to learn priority and responsibility. Priority is graduation. Responsibility is being successful in a career that sustains ur family which has nw started growing.

Now consider the actions of ur family and reasons for them and consider ur actions n hw u did not even realise the problem u actually hve was Neva even a problem compared to what u just found out by a stranger.
No matter hw difficult or harsh ur family may seem, it's something that shud always b respected as it benefits u mre den dem.
Ur parents death is tragic and you nt graduating n being focussed wud of been a great reason to quit.
But quitting cos of lust and family squabbles let a simple choice become a life altering event that everyone who knows u n cares for u sees n tries to prevent u from mkn besides u seeing urself. Wud like to continue but im sure u understand that u can either honour ur parents n listen to the rude n abusive family members n graduate. Or u can continue as u r n live a lifetime of regret when suddenly its impacts u into realisation. Gud luk

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Re: Family fighting my relationship!!

Postby Thabo » Sun Jun 04, 2017 7:03 pm

Nice one Souljah
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